The Cereal Murders

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October College Advisory Dinner for Seniors and Parents Headmaster’s House Elk Park Preparatory School Elk Park, Colorado SKEWERED SHRIMP LEEK AND ONION TARTLETS SALAD OF OAK LEAF LETTUCE AND RADICCHIO WITH RASPBERRY VINAIGRETTE ROAST BEEF AU JUS YORKSHIRE PUDDING PUREE OF ACORN SQUASH STEAMED BROCCOLI EARLY DECISION DUMPLINGS IVY LEAGUE ICE CREAM PIE

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“I’d kill to get into Stanford.” A you’ve-got-to-be-kidding laugh snorted across one of the dining tables at the headmaster’s house. “Start playing football,” whispered another voice. “Then they’ll kill to get you.”

At the moment of that sage advice, I was desperately balancing a platter of Early Decision Dumplings and Ivy League Ice Cream Pies, praying silently that the whole thing didn’t land on the royal blue Aubusson carpet. My job catering the first college advisory dinner for Colorado’s most famous prep school was almost over. It had been a long evening, and the only thing I would have killed to get into was a bathtub.

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