Letters To My Daughter's Killer

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Two publications provided me with invaluable research: Review into the Needs of Families Bereaved by Homicide by Louise Casey CB and Guiding Children Through Trauma and Grief by Jean Harris-Hendriks, Dora Black and Tony Kaplan (I’m leaving out the full book title here to avoid spoilers). A big thank you to Anna Graham who shared her experiences of working in libraries. And a cheer for librarians everywhere. Many thanks go to Krystyna Green and the team at C&R Crime and to my agent Sara Menguc for unstinting and generous support, encouragement and enthusiasm. I’m very grateful to Mary Sharratt and Kath Pilsbury for feedback on my work in progress – and for laughs along the way. Finally a big thanks (again) to Tim for everything – I couldn’t have done it without you.

17 Brinks Avenue

Manchester

M19 6FX

I hate you. My first letter, and that is all I want to say. I hate you. But those three words can barely convey the depth, the breadth, the soaring height of this hatred. Nearly four years, and what has taken me by surprise is that these feelings, of rage and the desire for vengeance, have not diminished but have grown. Time has not healed them but stoked the fires. The hatred has been forged into something steely, into a rock so dense and heavy inside that I fear it is killing me too. Crushing me. Taking what is left of my life and leaching the goodness, the joy, the optimism from it. So I am writing to you in the vain hope, for I think it is vain, that some communication can help me move beyond or around this pit of hate.

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