Midnight Man

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WHAT ELMO WIMPLER REALLY wanted to invent was a dry cereal that tasted like ham and eggs. Or pancakes. Or all those other things he couldn’t afford and didn’t know how to cook.

But he didn’t know how to do it, so he was stuck with dry cereal. One day cornflakes, then crisped rice, then that fruity stuff, then that chocolatey stuff. It was funny, he thought. If they could make a cereal taste like chocolate without putting any chocolate in it, why couldn’t they make one that tasted like ham and eggs? Or Belgian waffles—with strawberries and whipped cream? Chipped beef on toast?

Why not? Maybe he’d work on that. But only when he was finished with the invention that occupied his mind right now.

Today, Elmo Wimpler had no idea what cereal he was eating. He had just grabbed the box, poured some into a bowl, drowned it with a weak mixture of powdered milk and water, and started eating. After a while they all tasted alike.

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