Recollections of a Part-time Lady

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Come in, boys. Don’t mind the 2-watt bulbs: Your eyes will get used to it. I think it shows the flat off better, don’t you? My friend Crazy Arthur says, “Minette, if your flat was a movie, it would be called ‘Dust Be My Destiny.’” I used to say that I was more decorative than practical, but I can’t really even say that anymore. Let’s go into the front parlor. And I’ll tell you about the queens.

Queens are not a new thing, honey. Impersonators have been around as long as there has been a theater. Until the Restoration in 1660, all female roles on the English stage were played by impersonators. Of course, I don’t go back that far. My pictures of the queens go back to the turn of the century — they adorn my sheet music covers. It was a high point in American popular music, and I love playing those pieces here in this parlor, on that piano you see. Yesterday I washed the keys with milk so my fingers feel gorgeous making music. There on the music rack is Julian Eltinge, greatest of all.

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