The Zero Game

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I don’t belong here. I haven’t for years. When I first came to Capitol Hill to work for Congressman Nelson Cordell, it was different. But even Mario Andretti eventually gets bored driving two hundred miles an hour every single day. Especially when you’re going in a circle. I’ve been going in circles for eight years. Time to finally leave the loop.

“We shouldn’t be here,” I insist as I stand at the urinal.

“What’re you talking about?” Harris asks, unzipping his fly at the urinal next to mine. He has to crane his neck up to see my full lanky frame. At six feet four inches, I’m built like a palm tree and staring straight down at the top of his messy black hair. He knows I’m agitated, but as always, he’s the perfect calm in the storm. “C’mon, Matthew, no one cares about the sign out front.”

He thinks I’m worried about the bathroom. For once, he’s wrong. This may be the rest room right across from the Floor of the House of Representatives, and it may have a sign on the door that says, Members Only — as in Members of Congress… as in them… as in not us — but after all this time here, I’m well aware that even the most formal Members won’t stop two staffers from taking a whiz.

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