The Eternal Zero

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It was definitely right before the end of the war, but I don’t remember the exact date. That damn Zero, though, is something I’ll never forget. It was like the devil himself. I was a 5-inch artillery gunner on the USS Ticonderoga. My job was protecting the aircraft carrier from those crazy kamikazes that plunged right at us.

The 5-inch shells had so-called proximity fuzes. The proximity fuze emitted radio waves in a radius of 50 feet of the shell and was designed to detonate the instant interference from an approaching aircraft was sensed. It was an awesome weapon. I fired hundreds of those shells. And shot down most of the kamikazes before they got close to the carrier.

The first time I saw a kamikaze, I was seized by fear. I had deployed on the Ticonderoga in the beginning of 1945. I had heard rumors about the kamikazes, but when I first laid eyes on them, I thought, “They’re gonna drag me down to hell with them.” These suicide bombers were the height of madness. I wanted to think that it was a unique exception; however, their attacks came one after another. I thought they were not human. Far from not being afraid to die, they just threw themselves to death at us. Didn’t they have families, friends, lovers—anyone that would mourn their deaths? I was different. I had wonderful parents back in the Arizona countryside and a fiancée.

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