In the Name of a Killer

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Moscow sucked. Was that still the way you said you were pissed off, back home? She didn’t know. Ann Harris didn’t think she knew anything about America any more. Which was an obvious exaggeration, but one she allowed herself, more black depression to wrap around herself. She didn’t care whether it was the right word or not. Moscow definitely sucked. Everything sucked: the job and her career and her future and the embassy and this affair. This affair most of all.

She walked without direction, uncaring, woollen hat pulled low, hands buried deep in the pockets of her inadequate coat, the only idea to get away from the claustrophobia of her apartment and maybe, too, what had just happened there. Or rather, hadn’t happened.

He’d been in so much of a goddamned hurry there’d hardly been any point in their getting undressed: she hadn’t been anywhere near her climax when he’d withdrawn and from the way he’d held himself over her she was sure he’d checked his watch with the same gesture. Bastard. But that was hardly the discovery of the century. There’d been the usual bullshit about love when it had first started but that was all part of the familiar, well practised ritual. Now they’d stopped bothering with any pretence. It was a fuck, pure and simple: at least it was for him. For her, like tonight, it usually ended up as pure and simple frustration. At least he rarely tried the worst of the funny stuff now: tonight he scarcely hurt at all. Which meant, she supposed, he was doing it to somebody else, somebody new. It had to be somebody in the embassy. She wondered who. The bastard.

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