The Celery Stalks At Midnight

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HAVING BEEN in the publishing business for many years, there is little left to surprise me. I have, as Harold puts it in his new book, come to “expect the unexpected.” So I wasn’t surprised in the least to receive a phone call recently from a well-known literary agent asking me to take a look at a new client’s book. Business as usual, I thought. Imagine my amazement upon receipt of the manuscript and following note to discover just who her new client was.

Dear Ed, (the author wrote familiarly)

I hope you won’t think I’ve “gone Hollywood,” but my friend Chester convinced me that with this, my third book, I should hire an agent. “After all,” he counseled me, “who’s going to handle all those requests that will undoubtedly pour in for your personal appearances on the Today show, the Tonight show and Animal Kingdom? And who will watch over your editor to make sure he treats you with the respect due the most famous canine author since Erich Beagle?” I hope you will forgive the latter comment as I have had no complaints with your treatment of me thus far and anticipate only the best in our continued relationship.

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